Clinging to the Vine: September 2011

Frugal Friday--Another Bargain Wall Hanging

9:03 AMHeather

These days I am knee deep in holiday preparation. NOT Columbus Day or Halloween, but yes, CHRISTMAS preparation. In order to dispel any label of Supermom or Super Organized, allow me to explain. I am in charge of CREATE Christmas at my church, which is a super fun craft event on November 5th. (Sure, I've mentioned this before--and you can be sure I will mention it again). The point of CREATE Christmas is to come and craft and go home with bargain Christmas gifts. Every project is either $5 or $10.

Since those craft supplies don't magically appear, I have been having lots of fun handling the shopping for this big day, which has totally put me in the Christmas shopping mood. So, my shopping has looked a little like this. One thing for CREATE Christmas, one thing for someone on my Christmas list. :) Have I mentioned how much I LOVE finding or making gifts for people?

This is one of my favorite stand-by gifts, for teachers or friends or family.

Of course, I had to make one to give myself first. This hangs in my breakfast nook, and again--is an item that seems to draw people's attention. So, I thought you bloggy friends might enjoy this idea this Frugal Friday. I must say that this is NOT one of my cheapest gift ideas, but it carries a big punch for a substantial gift idea.

Start with an inexpensive frame--and my trick here is that this was a framed and matted picture of a rooster in it's former life. When Hobby Lobby had wall decor for half-off, I snatched it up. I WISH that I had a picture of that so you can see how it started out. I think it was about $20--but this included the matting. I have found some framed and matted wall art for about $12 (with 50% off discount)--so look with fresh eyes on framed items--ignore the artwork, because you will rip it out anyway.

I used a fabric scrap I had from some past project, and I bought the metal word at Hobby Lobby--again half-off. That cost me $4. I have also made this by cutting a word from black cardstock with my Cricut when I couldn't find the metal word I wanted (even cheaper, of course). I simply hot glued the metal letter onto the fabric, using a bit of E6000 as well to ensure a tight hold. Then, I just used some cross charms (yes, again--50% off at Hobby Lobby) and hot glued them on the fabric as well. The charms were leftover from another project, but the total cost for the charms were about $5.

Now, pull out the matting from the frame, and spread a bit of hot glue on the back of the mat--all around. Quickly adhere the decorated fabric to the mat. Now slip it all into your frame. Voile!

I think it's a high impact look for about $30. Of course, you can do it for even less if you find a great frame on discount or the slightly damaged section of the craft store. Even better--repurpose an old frame with artwork you are tired of, or raid a garage sale or thrift store.

Excited to share a HUGE wall display next Frugal Friday...it was very quick and cheap, and is large enough that it hangs above my couch. Have a good weekend and happy frugal crafting!

Toddlers & Tiaras--Where's Your Crown?

9:09 AMHeather

If you wonder where my blog post was yesterday--I am wondering the same thing. Because honestly--I just couldn't make sense of my crowded brain enough to form coherent sentences. Alas, today is a new day--and I have something to share that I hope is somewhat profound, even if it's based on the TLC show, Toddlers and Tiaras.

What on earth could be profound about that train wreck of a television show? Well, first off--it's a profound reflection of our human condition and the depths we have all fallen to be entertained. These crazy moms (and sometimes dads)--some crazier than others--who go to GREAT lengths to have their child win some crown. It's hard to keep a straight face when the child wins a whopping $1000 cash prize and gloats about it--knowing the parents have spent that several times over just to get the child equipped for the pageant. And, is it just me--or in some episodes does it seem that only a handful of girls are competing in each category, yet we wait in suspense to see if they place? Of course they will! There are only 5 girls. All the while, a smattering of audience members (mostly, it would seem, are family members of the contestants) take in the whole affair? I am just saying--these do not seem to be well attended events with hundreds of contestants.

Yes, friends--I have been known to be sucked into this drama. Particularly on a Saturday afternoon while the children have room time. It is truly like driving by a car accident scene--you know you shouldn't gawk, but you just can't fight the curiosity? I would like to blame my curiosity on my insatiable hunger to explore human dynamics as any good social worker would. Ah, who am I kidding? I am just intrigued.

But, this morning, as I wrote out a nightly Scripture card for my daughter's pillow, I couldn't help but think of Toddlers and Tiaras while I inked the words to Psalm 149:4:

For the Lord takes delight in His people;

He crowns the humble with salvation.

If you, too, have fallen victim to the temptation of this glitz show then you know of which I speak when I say that most of the time, the parents--particularly the mom--seems to delight in the event more than the participant. Oh, she coaches and watches intently from the sideline, aware of every move and action, clapping and drinking it all in. She is DELIGHTED in her child's every effort. Well, except for the insane and cruel stage moms who are critical of every mistake--but I am not talking about them right now.

Back to the delighted moms--is that NOT a picture of our Heavenly Father? He watches our every move, delighting in our efforts for Him in this game of life. At times, I feel sure that He is more aware and more delighted at my baby steps toward victory than I am--because I am much like those seemingly disinterested pageant contestants. He is clapping and cheering for me. If God had a blinged out t-shirt to show his affection for me, it would boldly proclaim that He was MY supporter.

And, while those little tots may be overwhelmed to earn a ridiculous crown that is taller than they are, my Abba has an even better crown than any rhinestone studded, 4 foot pageant crown. It's the CROWN of salvation. It's worth and value far exceeds any earthly jewel. When I humbly direct my daily efforts in life to glorify Him, then I am competing well. When I go through my day mindful of His presence, aware of how I might best bring a smile to His face, I am running my race well. And, if it were possible, God would make a fool of Himself to show his love for me. Oh, wait--it is possible--and He did. Because how foolish does it seem to the world that God would express His love for me by sending his Son to die?

INTENTIONAL challenge: Now, I am not saying you have to watch Toddlers and Tiaras. If you've never seen it, just picture the scene of an impossibly delighted parent rooting like a maniac for their most beloved child in a nail biting competition. Oh, those pageant moms act like their daughter's attempts to win Little Miss Perfectly Wonderful Best Girl in the World IS life or death. But, our efforts in this life really are life and death--it's the real deal. And day after day--can you just picture your Heavenly Father taking delight in YOU? Crowning you with salvation? Beats any glitz and glamor this world has to offer--that's for sure!

You Gotta FIGHT for Your RIGHT to PAR-TAY!

8:49 AMHeather

Oh my gravy--my toes are so stinking sore! Because they are indeed getting stepped on left and right by this Lies Women Believe Bible study. It's worse than when I wear flip flops near my boys with their big feet and heavy tennis shoes. Today's zinger? How we fall for the lie that we have our rights.

Let me tell you. I have been disturbed by this thing we call "entitlement." That buzz phrase is used a lot--but it's also quite evident these days in our culture. Funny how I can sit back offended by others' entitlement issues when they step on my rights that I'm entitled to. As Cooper would say--"OH, the irony!" (His new favorite phrase). Boy, can I get frustrated quickly when driving--that is a sure sign of the rampant entitlement around here. HELLO! It's called a YIELD sign (a phrase I must shamefully admit my children now repeat). Or when I stand patiently in a long line at a store and some lady walks up and steps in front me, sweetly saying, "Oh, I just need to ask a question." GRRR. Wait your turn, lady. (hypothetical situation, of course....)

Yeah, I know. I am just one of the crowd with entitlement issues. Today's lesson is bruising me a bit with the truth of it. Because I do think I have the right to be appreciated by my children, for my family to upkeep the housework I do, for wider margins in my schedule, for time to be brain dead after my children are in bed, (and speaking of) for my children to follow the bed time routine without delaying, for my new dog to learn to stop marking in the house, for my Sunday paper to actually have ALL the sections included. Aren't these my certain inalienable rights?!

But, there's a big old problem with this logic. If I want to really get to the heart of my rights--I DON'T have the right to be forgiven and redeemed from all sin. I DON'T have the right to be given a personal relationship with the God of the Universe. I DON'T have the right to eternal life. I DON'T have the right to claim the Lord as the lover of my soul and my Great Provider. I DON'T have the right to have been adopted as a child and heir through the death of Christ. None of those were my rights--just God's loving gift of grace and mercy.

And, if I am to be a "Christian"--or as we reminded our children last night--a little Christ, a representation of Christ--then I must be like Him. He, who:

being in very natureGod,
   did not consider equality with God something to be used to his own advantage;
⁷ rather, he made himself nothing
   by taking the very natureof a servant,
   being made in human likeness.
⁸ And being found in appearance as a man,
   he humbled himself
   by becoming obedient to death—
      even death on a cross!

Philippians 2:6-8

No where in there did Christ assert His rights. Rather than climb the ladder of success, stepping on others along the way, He climbed down the ladder, humbling himself before others. As a believer, if I want to press for my rights--how about choosing to do RIGHT by living as Christ would have me?

INTENTIONAL challenge: Ay-yi-yi. Do I have a long way to go. Because my mind is flooding with all the ways I go through each day asserting my rights. In a million ways, all day long, my mindset is about MY rights. That I might continue to reveal, unravel and release these lies from my mind and heart. Abba--today, help me to do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility to consider others better than myself (Philippians 2:3)!

The Prowling LIE-on

9:13 AMHeather

I am alarmed. And outraged. Because there is an epidemic going on around me, and it makes my stomach churn. I have been living with this epidemic in my own family for some time, but have come to see the other victims in the last few weeks--an "in your face" come-to-see realization. Three of my dear friends--without the other ones knowing this--have come to me in confidence and shared their anguish over a severe and debilitating threat to their children. All three have a son who is being crippled by anxiety and fear. I'm not talking "there might be monsters in my closet" kind of childhood fear. I am talking an all out war for their emotional well being, tears and anguish kind of fear. The kind that breaks a mother's heart and leaves these sweet Mamas exhausted and at the end of their rope.

First, one friend shared their daily struggle that has impacted their entire family as daily routines have been changed to try to ease the situation. A few days later, another friend sat at my kitchen table and shared nearly the same story. It was a de ja vu moment. Then, last week, a friend called me with again, nearly the exact same story.

Let me tell you my assessment. It is best summed up with this verse.

Be alert and of sober mind. Your enemy the devil

prowls around like a roaring lion looking

for someone to devour.

1 Peter 5:8

We have an enemy waging war with us and our children. He is seeking to devour them with his lies and deceit. He is the Father of lies, and lying is his native language (John 8:44). I'm not meaning to sound all spooky or creepy--but I am calling it like I see it.

We get so relaxed in our busy schedules and we function out of pure exhaustion through our daily task lists. And we can get complacent to the facts of this war. But, let me assure you--it's happening. The enemy is seeking to stake a claim on our kids by consuming them with lies about things they should fear and their inability to cope. Or in my house, it looks different. It looks more like a torrent of emotions and frustrations and pride. If you have not experienced a similar emotional melt down in our home, let me tell you something. Our cunning enemy needs only to pester one family member--because we all go down through the emotional upheaval of one child.

What I have experienced and what these friends of mine have experienced leads to a feeling of hopelessness. We are carried on the waves of emotions churning out of control, and it feels impossible to stop the tidal wave. I really don't have all the answers. But, I do know a few things. I know that we are more than conquerors through Him who loved us (Romans 8:37), and if God is for us--who can be against us? (Romans 8:31).

Consider this a battle cry from a fellow soldier mom. Moms (and Dads)--we gotta get our game on. We gotta be warrior moms, getting our armor on (Ephesians 6:10-18). We need to get outfitted for battle, and get down to business. We need to wield our Sword of Truth, battling the lies with the power of the Word of God. Pray those verses that speak to the problem--out loud, with your kids, post them all over the house. We gotta equip our sons and daughters to wield their Sword, too! Let's help them memorize those verses that speak to them so they can say them and pray them and claim them.

And, we can't forget the power of prayer. I don't mean just those desperate, "Lord help now!" prayers. I mean, on our faces, seriously pouring out our heart prayers. I mean prayer walking the house and each room out loud, calling out the enemy and his schemes through the power of the blood of Christ. I mean, praying with our kids in desperate pleas--teaching them how to take a stand against the enemy so he will flee. James 4:7 says: Submit yourselves, then, to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you. There's not a maybe there--although it's all too easy for me to read it that way because I get so bogged down with doubt.

INTENTIONAL challenge: The TRUTH is that we have been set free and we have the power of Christ in us to do this battle. We must recognize it for what it is--it's a battle, alright. An epidemic trying to sweep up our children. So, c'mon warrior mamas--let's get to battle! Let's get serious about holding each other up, being transparent, and doing battle together. Let's wield our Swords, stand firm, then keep standing firm. Let's equip our kids. Let's remember that the victory was already won on the cross. Let's call out that prowling LIE-on, and let him know that we are serious about being the prayer cover for our children. Let's remind him that he's gotta flee and we are MORE than conquerors. Who wants to do a battle cry with me?!

Frugal Friday--WHATEVER

6:55 PMHeather

Who Says? The World? or the Word?

8:31 PMHeather

The Plus is the Problem

9:56 AMHeather

On the first night of this Lies Women Believe study I noted on Facebook that I thought it would be a brutally awesome Bible study. Truer words were never spoken. Brutal. Yet in an awesome way. This last week we've been focusing on the lies we tend to believe about God. Lots of zingers for me there--hitting me square between the eyes.

One of which is the fact that the plus is a problem in my life. You see, I tend to struggle with the idea that God is enough. I tend to fall into that category of "God plus [fill in the blank]" is enough. Here is what this looks like for me. Right now, I have a decision to make. And, yes, I have prayed about it. I've asked the Lord to show me the best path to take. Yet, I still have this craving to take a poll of all my friends, my husband, and others to see what they think. I'm looking for that answer, and rather than pour myself in prayer, I want the opinion and advice of those around me.

Or, I tend to struggle with anxiety. It's an old stronghold for me, one that continually haunts me to varying degrees. While I KNOW that God is my provider, I tend to feel angst about our continual pursuit to build a good savings account. In other words, this shows up that God plus an adequate savings account is my security.

How about this lovely one? The God of the entire Universe--the Creator of all that is--loves me to death. Literally--the death of his one and only Son. You'd think basking in all that love would make me feel--well, LOVED--and secure and joyful. But, yet, I have this tendency to feel that God's love plus the approval of others equals my ability to feel loved. UGH.

I am seeing these things clearly--recognizing once again these strongholds to battle, these deceits to weed out, these things that need to changing. And, I feel more angst about how to go about this. It feels like the same old struggle. I have the head knowledge--I can quote some Scripture. But, the heart is another matter.

INTENTIONAL challenge: So, bloggy friends, all I can say is that I am asking God to show up. I am asking Him to just take these things--these "pluses" and clear them out. I am asking Him to give me EYES to see how very "ENOUGH" He is. I am throwing my hands up, acknowledging my "pluses" and pleading with him each time I struggle or think about it to just remove them and erase them completely. I am asking Him to write all over my heart and head that He is enough--enough said.

Feelings, Nothing More than Feelings

8:22 AMHeather

Help! I've fallen and I can't get up! For real--as I am journeying through Lies Women Believe, I am ever more aware of how I have fallen for the deceit the enemy feeds me. As I pray for eyes to see the lies and for the faith to really BELIEVE the truth, I am feeling a bit overwhelmed. So, I find myself hitting my emergency alert button over and over--Lord, HELP!! I WANT to see the lies for what they are and I want to to be able to dwell on the truth to combat the deceit.

I think one of the biggest challenges this last week can best be summed up by this quote from Nancy Leigh DeMoss:

"And therein lies one of our problems:

We trust what we feel to be true rather

than what we know to be true."

We, as women, are emotional creatures, which gets us into all kinds of trouble. As the old song says, we pin our thoughts and therefore actions on feelings--nothing more than feelings. The reality is that we live in a world that tells us things like trust your gut, go with your heart, do what feels right. Ugh. This is simply a lie from the pit of hell. It sounds all nice and good and all. But, we know better than anyone that our feelings change on a dime. God knows it, too--as he warns us in this verse:

The heart is deceitful above all things

and beyond cure. Who can understand it?

Jeremiah 17:9

These are not startling revelations to me. But, the epiphany is coming to me that I must pay WAY more attention to how my feelings guide my thought life--and therefore serve to rule ME. THAT is the root of much strife in my life. For instance, I feel stressed by the crazy schedule for our family of 5. I feel out of control, so I think that I am out of control, and then I act grumpy or irritated--seeking to gain control somewhere. All the time ignoring the fact that God is in control. Scripture promises that He knows the days ordained for me, and they were written in His book before one of them came to me. Instead of going all crazy, I can meditate on this verse and ask Him to order my steps through today and remind me that He has it all under control.

It really boils down to a choice. Just like in marriage, we don't always FEEL crazy in love, we choose to love. Or, with my kids, I don't always feel warm and fuzzy toward them. But, I have to choose to obey God's command to love them with gentleness. I don't always feel I have it all under control. I have to choose to let my mind dwell on the "WHATEVERS" of Philippians 4:8 (whatever is true, noble, right, pure, praiseworthy, excellent, admirable, lovely). I have to choose to think on the promises of Scripture so that I remember who IS in control. I don't always feel like putting myself aside to serve my family and be a homemaker. But, I have to choose to do everything I do, as I do it, to please God. Yes, I have been singing that new Steven Curtis Chapman song Do Everything as I load the dishwasher, scrub the potty, and remind my children [again] to pick up their things.

INTENTIONAL challenge: Maybe I'm a remedial believer, and this is all "DUH" to you. But, I have to say that I can look all nice and good on the outside--going to church, singing in worship, doing the Christian thing. Things get real personal when God starts dealing with me on my thought life. THAT is where the rubber meets the road. THAT is where intimacy and growth are born--when I begin to recognize the deceitful feelings that I let rule my days. That I would begin to see feeling for what they are--nothing more than feelings--that change on a whim. But, the TRUTH of God's Word? THAT is some powerful, life changing stuff that can take captive every deceitful thought and feeling. It's as simple today as writing down a verse that stands out to me, and choosing to think on THAT when my feelings play tug of war, taking me in a bad direction. Abba--help me to think on these things--on those WHATEVERS--that life-giving truth! Root out those deceitful feelings and thoughts--give me eyes to see them today.

Moving Forward

9:50 AMHeather

I write in my Bible. My Life Group teacher told us last night that some people consider this disrespectful--but I am one of "those." One of the things I like to do next to a passage of particular significance is to write the date and a quick notation about the situation that the passage addresses in my life.

You should see Isaiah 43:18-19. It is dated July 2001 during my post partum depression. Under that is a note about the spring of 2007 when I was overwhelmed with God's call to quit my little business. Then, again, in the fall of 2010, as we prepared for a family mission trip to India--for which God closed, or should I SLAMMED, the door shut. And, again, in the spring of this year as I sought God's healing for migraines, my neck fiasco and related health issues.

All that to say that you'd think I'd be well familiar with this passage. You'd think I'd have gleaned all the nuggets of truth and wisdom from it that it has to offer. You'd think that I could recite it, having taken to heart every ounce of meaning it had to offer. Yeah, you'd think. But, you'd be wrong. Because, you see--I can be a little slow to learn....

I was just recently reading this passage again, and BAM, one particular line stood out to me. It was that context part that totally changed the meaning. Imagine how startled I was--considering how many seasons of my life that I had stood on this promise--yet never noticed this one particular facet. Check it out.

¹⁸ “Forget the former things;
   do not dwell on the past.
¹⁹ See, I am doing a new thing!
   Now it springs up; do you not perceive it?
I am making a way in the wilderness
   and streams in the wasteland.

In the past, I had always focused in on verse 19--on God's ability to do a new thing, to make a way, to bring Living Water to my dry and thirsty soul, to be encouraged by God's ability to lead me to new seasons.

But, how I was missing the directive in verse 18. DUH. And, I believe it is a key element. My job? Forget the former things. Don't dwell on the past. On my past mistakes, on past wounds, on past failures, on past successes. Don't camp out there. Don't build a shrine to the past and worship at its altar. But, pack it all up, and be ready.

And, THEN, God's job? To do a new thing. To make a way. To blow our minds and astound us with the "immeasurably more than we could ask or imagine" (Ephesians 3:20) that He wants to do. In order to move forward to the land of new things, new seasons, new and intimate fellowship with Him, I MUST forget the past and not dwell on the what was. Today, I gotta put yesterday behind me, and let Him lead me to new places.

INTENTIONAL challenge: As an Army Brat, I moved a lot as a kid. Obviously, we couldn't embrace all the new and unknown until we'd packed up the old house. From a practical perspective, this is a no brainer. But, I am afraid that emotionally and spiritually, I box God in and miss the grandeur of the "new things" because I keep looking back. I want Him to move me forward, but I keep dwelling on the past. I want Him to take me to new places with new callings, but I keep thinking about what has and hasn't worked in the past. It's as though I keep playing with my old nasty broken toys on Christmas morning when He has a bounty of new unwrapped gifts awaiting me. Lord, unclasp my grip on the past. Move my heart and mind to the future. Help me to move forward! Give me eyes to see the new things you are doing and the faith to turn all I am toward them.

Frugal Friday--GREAT gift, under $1

5:59 AMHeather

Liar Liar Pants on Fire

8:12 AMHeather

Have you ever tried to peel off that clear packing tape, but it's so torn up that you can't figure out where to start? It's hard to see that line where it starts, and then most of the time when I use it, I manage to tear off a strip half it's width, so it's wound all funny and takes awhile to get it pulled off the roll to where there is a useful end, the full width.

That's sorta how I am feeling about my heart right now. I decided to do the Bible study for Lies Women Believe by Nancy Leigh DeMoss this fall. Honestly, two weeks in, I KNOW that I have much to unwind in the deceit that I have taken to heart. But, it's like that roll of packing tape. I can't even begin to see where the line is to start pulling it off--tearing off the layers of deceit to get to the good stuff--the TRUTH. The deceit of our enemy--who tells me that I must earn approval, prove my worth through accomplishments, never give up full control, find my value and security in earthly things.

Listen, I grew up in the church. My dad was a pastor--as though that ranks me higher in the Christian heirarchy? I went to a Baptist university. I was even a GA--which shows your age if you know what that stands for. I honestly have never had some wild period of rebellion. But, my heart is wrapped up in deceits so deep--lies that are half-truths and therefore even harder to unravel. Like when the packing tape gets ripped into half it's width. I just hardly know where to start.

I know God is good. But, I struggle to believe that he is FOR me--completely rooting for victory for me. I know God is faithful, and He has proven that time and again. But, all too often--instead of dwelling on his track record in order to remove my doubt, I tend to wonder if He'll come through this time? Or will he abandon me? I know He loves me. But, sometimes it feels like a distant love--one you might have for a beloved relative that you rarely see. Instead of the intimate love of a Father who craves time with me every minute of every day, walking me through every detail of life's journey. I believe in God. But, I struggle to BELIEVE God--to take Him at his Word and know that He means it and will never break these personal promises to me.

INTENTIONAL challenge: Boy, do I sense that I am in for a brutally amazing doubt killing, deceit revealing ride in this journey. I know I am in for some rude awakenings--perhaps even painful. But, I am desperate for eyes to see the lies and deceit that this world has sold me. I am desperate to see that line on the tape so I can start pulling off the bad, torn to shreds part. I want the Truth. I need him to help me handle the Truth. I want to walk in the freedom of the good stuff. Really knowing the TRUTH of who He is. Really believing in His love for me and goodness toward me. Really walking intimately with the One whose heart desire is for me to never stray from His presence. Abba, give me eyes to see the lies, give me strength to rip them off to find the Truth. Give me a heart to believe. I do believe! Lord, help my unbelief!

Oh, For the Love

8:24 AMHeather

In case you missed the news, there is a new addition to our family...and it's a BOY!

My son, Cooper, took this darling picture of our Murphy. Murphy is a beagle mix rescue dog that we adopted on Saturday. As we set out that morning to an adoption event, my anxiety level increased. What if all 5 of us couldn't agree on one dog? How would we know which dog to choose--if any? Although it felt like it--was it really the right time to add a dog to our family?

Well, suffice it to say--Murphy seemed to choose us. I won't bore you with all the details, but as soon as he came out of his crate, his tail was wagging, he came up to greet us, and jumped in my lap. 2 out of 3 children literally CRIED in their desperate pleas that THIS WAS THE ONE! The other child was on his hands and knees begging that we take Murphy home. And, my man was like a child in the pleading look in his eyes and sly smile that said, "YES, PLEASE!"

How happy do they all look?! As we brought Murphy into our home, I wondered what we'd be in for in our transition. He was found wondering the streets, so we knew nothing about his background. But, the few days we've had him have led me to some conclusions.

Murphy is very laid back, friendly, loyal, and good natured. He follows us around the house--always wanting to be near us. He will jump into your lap, has shown no aggression or anxiety, and even lets Caris carry him around like a baby doll--which, by the way, we are now training Caris to NOT do. He follows commands well and seems to be bonding to us with no issue whatsoever.

From all this, I am assuming that he was loved in his last home. Because he acts as though he was. The way he acts and reacts to us makes me think that he had a good life before--because he so readily shows love and affection and accepts it from us, too.

I was thinking through this last night, and thought of this chorus from a Mark Schultz song:

Live like you're loved by the Lord above

Spread out your wings and never give up

Cause you can do anything

Be who you're meant to be

Always remember to dream and keep your head up

And live like you're loved

INTENTIONAL challenge: What about you? As you enter a new place or interact with others, is it obvious that you are loved by the way you act? Do you extend grace and kindness and love to others, as a sure sign of the fact that you are being loved fiercely by the God of all creation? How do I go through my day? Do I live in such a way that there is no doubt that I am loved? Lord, please help me to really accept your love--for the love of the Father--help me to embrace it, rest in it, and be changed by it!

Dying Declarations

3:22 PMHeather

Much of the coverage of 9/11 remembrances brought me to tears. Okay, most of the coverage of 9/11 remembrances brought me to tears. The heart wrenching scenes and reports felt raw and painful, as I believe they should. How can we be changed and learn from it if we don't continue to feel its impact?

I think the most difficult yet inspirational coverage I have heard involves the dying declarations of the victims. The phone messages left or conversations had as those on the airplanes or in the buildings realized their fate. What a precious gift they left--affirming their love for their family and friends, giving instructions and admonitions for life. Perhaps my heart is tendered to these accounts because I never got to say good-bye to my dad? And, I've always felt it would have helped me grieve if I just could have had him tell me one last time that he loved me, that I should carry on, that he knew what his fate was to be and he accepted it.

Sunday morning, our pastor shared the amazing story of a victim in the buildings, working in a floor above the impact. Knowing there was no escape for them, he gathered his 50 or so coworkers and shared the gospel with them. The families of the coworkers shared this with his widow, as their family members phoned or e-mailed before their deaths and told what was happening in their final moments.

Dying declarations. To have a chance to say what you want to say--what needs to be said.   To take that opportunity--before your impending last breath--to share your heart with those most dear to you. Certainly, in those last moments of life, you share your deepest heart and strongest convictions for those whom you count as most precious to you.

Did you know that as your Savior stared death in the face, he was offering a dying declaration for YOU? YOU were on His mind. You were the one with whom he wanted to share His heart. As death loomed near, he used those last moments to pray for you and for me. Check it out for yourself in John 17:20-26. This passage is Jesus' prayer, after the Last Supper and before His arrest.

²⁰ “My prayer is not for them alone. I pray also for those who will believe in me through their message, ²¹ that all of them may be one, Father, just as you are in me and I am in you. May they also be in us so that the world may believe that you have sent me. ²² I have given them the glory that you gave me, that they may be one as we are one— ²³ I in them and you in me—so that they may be brought to complete unity. Then the world will know that you sent me and have loved them even as you have loved me. ²⁴ “Father, I want those you have given me to be with me where I am, and to see my glory, the glory you have given me because you loved me before the creation of the world.

²⁵ “Righteous Father, though the world does not know you, I know you, and they know that you have sent me. ²⁶ I have made youknown to them, and will continue to make you known in order that the love you have for me may be in them and that I myself may be in them.”

Just picture it. He knows that death is imminent--he knows his fate. And, he uses that dying declaration to plead to His Father on behalf of all believers--on OUR behalf. This is what He asked:

*for God to give us a spirit of unity

*that we show His love to a lost world in order to win them over *that we would know we are as loved as God loved his Son

*that we would BE with Him

*that we would see His glory

*that we would have HIS love in us

*that we would have CHRIST in us

INTENTIONAL challenge: I have heard the voice mails of the people on Flight 93. It gives me goosebumps to hear them--particularly the one where the husband tells his wife how much he loves her and to do good in her life--basically to live well. I have wondered what it would feel like to hear such a message and the legacy of such words. But the truth is--I have received such a message. And so have you. I challenge you today to take a few minutes and read the above passage as it was written. A dying declaration from a Savior to his beloved children as death loomed near.

Always Remember--Never Forget

11:25 AMHeather

I've noticed that this last week or two, there have been a plethora of television specials about 9/11. Even my local news has been featuring a little segment daily on reflections from that day. Personally, I think it's wise to remember and mark such occasions. I am pleased to see us as a country reflecting on that day as the 10th anniversary looms ahead. Although, I also wonder about all the other anniversaries between the first one and this one, when I think we've been a bit too lazy in marking this day in history?

In any event, I have found it true in my own life that remembering even the hard milestones can be encouraging--a vivid reminder of the pits that I've been redeemed from, the wounds that have healed, even if a scar is left in their place. As Beth Moore says, sometimes we need to go back to see God as Lord of our past so that He can truly be Lord of our todays and our tomorrows. He is, after all, the same YESTERDAY, today and forever.

Last night, as I was flipping through my Bible during Bible study, my eyes went to a particular verse in 1 Samuel. I marked it as one to share with my children on their nightly Bible verse index cards that I leave on their pillows.

²⁴ But be sure to fear the LORD

and serve him faithfully with all your heart;

consider what great things he has done for you.

1 Samuel 12:24

I write my children a little note on the back of their cards, adding my insight or thoughts for the verse. Today, I wrote this same verse for all 3 children, and as I wrote their notes, something occurred to me.

You see, when we stop and consider, or remember, all the GREAT things He has done for us, day by day, year by year, I believe we are all the more motivated to serve Him faithfully with ALL our heart. It brings us to a point of awe and reverence of--or fear of--the Lord. I don't know if you are like me. But, let me be honest. Some days, I just don't fear him enough. I don't revere him enough. I don't love him enough. And, I certainly have many the day that I serve him half-heartedly--or not at all. Some days, I just don't want to serve Him. I get so side tracked on serving my own needs and agenda.

At first glance, I saw the first half of that verse, and felt a small sense of dread. Ugh--yes, I am to serve Him faithfully, with all of my heart. I often find that hard to do. But, then I saw the second half of that verse, and saw a key to my ability to serve Him faithfully with my whole heart. When I stop and consider all the great things he has done for me--I love Him more. I am in awe. I am drawn to repentance by His lovingkindness. I am drawn to whole hearted service.

INTENTIONAL challenge: Today, I am asking the Lord to help me remember and consider all the great things He has done for me. Things he's done in the past. Pits from which He has rescued me. Even small little ways that He shows His great faithfulness to me in this day. Like seeing the blue skies and feeling the cooler temperatures and considering them love notes to me from my Great Creator. I am praying for eyes to see--I am asking him to help me choose to see--his hand in all the good and bad. In this, may I be spurred to serve Him faithfully with my whole heart. Even as I do the dishes, put away the laundry, and remind my children for the millionth time about picking up their belongings. May I do it all faithfully--with my whole heart! For the One who does great things for me.

9/11...Sharing a Personal Letter

8:00 AMHeather

9/11. One of those days that if you were alive and old enough, you remember every detail of it. I know it's etched in my memory. My boys were 2 1/2 and 6 months. Too young to fully understand. Then, again, I think most of us cannot fully understand. I wrote each of my boys a letter about that day. In honor of the 10th anniversary, I will share my letter to Collin with you today.

Dear Collin--
September 11 started like any other day. After breakfast, we were putting Cooper down for his nap when the phone rang. A friend from church was tracking down another friend who had traveled to New York on business. Becca was frantic on the phone, and said, "They are flying planes into the World Trade Center and the Pentagon." It took me a minute to realize she wasn't joking. I turned on the television--my heart in my stomach--and called Daddy. He agreed we would let you watch as this history unfolded.

I fell to the floor as you and I watched the second plane hit the second tower--live on television. I have never before or since heard such panic in a television broadcaster's voice. You had many questions, and I tried to be honest. I told you some men who were very mean did a very bad thing, and many people got hurt. You prayed with me for our friend in New York on business, your Uncle John who worked at the Pentagon, and our American Airlines flight attendant friend. Each of these 3 friends were safe--although Uncle John was called in to do search and recovery for weeks afterward at the Pentagon. He met the president during his 12 hours on and 12 hours off shifts. But, we know it was very traumatic for him.

You and I thanked God later that all our friends and family were safe. We watched TV all day and talked to Dad all day long, too. It was stunning, shocking--just unbelievable.

We went to a prayer service at church that night--and I was SO glad. What perspective to walk into church and sing about how our God reigns--to remember that He is STILL on His throne, even after something like this. It's like I had been telling you all day long--GOD IS STILL THE BIGGEST.

What happened that day was horrible, and truly a day that changed our country. I feel more vulnerable--knowing something like that can happen here in America. We always tend to think of such violence and war in other countries. It's hard to understand why someone can hate us so much that they'd do something so awful. But, it's also amazing to consider what the Lord did in the midst of it all. He protected countless thousands of people from harm. Initial reports said up to 50,000 people visit each tower every day. His name was called on, exalted and trusted--on international television. He brought our country closer, He stirred the hearts of leaders to call on Him. We pray His comfort was felt by all who suffered. I assure you of this--He is still God--and He is the biggest. As you struggle with your own fears about that day--or face other trials in life--remember, my sweet boy--if God were small enough to understand, He wouldn't be big enough to worship.

I love you so very much,
Your Mom

Ask Your Children Questions...LOTS of questions

1:37 PMHeather

I am good at giving lectures. Too good. Just ask my children. In fact, my middle child was quick to let me know this issue about as soon as he could talk. One day when he was about 2, I was giving him a lecture about who knows what. I got about 2 sentences into it when he put his little plump toddler fingers over my mouth and said, "Too many words, Mama. Too many words."

You'd think I would have quit while I was ahead. Um, a big N-O. Because I still tend to be Way. Too. Wordy. And, although I know that all they hear is Charlie Brown's teacher, I struggle to stop myself. Nothing has changed--it is still probably the least effective way to reach my middle child, not to mention his brother and sister.
Last spring, I hosted a book club for Six Ways to Keep the Little in Your Girl. SUCH a good read, Moms! You really must take the time to read this book that is a quick read and chock full of great, practical advice. And, no worries--Dannah Gresh's version for boys comes out in January 2012! Anyhoo, back on to the topic at hand. (SEE? TOO many words....)

One of the most practical parenting tips I gleaned from Dannah was to connect with your kids by asking them questions. Instead of talking to them, ask them for their opinion or thoughts during any and all conversations, at every opportunity. This draws them in, shows them their importance, and conveys respect for them. When I first read the book, I immediately put it into practice, and boy, did I see success!

This is still a habit I need to refine. Priscilla Shirer's study of Jonah was a vivid reminder of that fact. When I was reading Jonah 4, I saw that asking my children questions--especially to point them toward repentence--is truly a Biblical practice. Here is Jonah--fresh from the belly of the whale, probably still smelling like seaweed. And, instead of bowing to his Father's authority, he is throwing a fit because God had mercy on the Ninevites. Check it out!

³ Therefore now, O LORD, please take my life

from me, for death is better to me than life.”

^{If I were on the other end of that, I'd probably launch into lecture #76 on questioning my authority and showing disrespect. Thank goodness our Heavenly Father knows better. Look at his response:}

⁴ The LORD said, “Do you have good reason to be angry?”

As Jonah continues his tirade throughout the rest of Jonah 4, God continues to respond with questions. Truly, when I think about it--how often did Jesus respond to his disciples and critics alike--by asking them questions? Rather than assert his authority in a way that proves He is boss (as he would be justified to do)--he reaches out and draws them in. He puts relationship over demanding respect.

INTENTIONAL challenge: Asking questions. What a brilliant way to connect with others--from my children to my husband to friends and new acquaintances. This is truly a Biblical example to follow--starting now and all day long. But one word of warning--it requires humility and self-control to ask others to speak instead of listen. What do you think? Are you going to give it a try? Would you share what happens? Do you think I'll ever master this technique? Are you tired of me asking you questions? Really, can you answer me? Will you post your comments below?

Frugal Friday--The Happiness That is My Coupon Binder

1:01 PMHeather

Before I dive into all the bliss that my coupon binder brings me, thought I'd let you see the "AFTER" photo of my tomato closet.

AH! I think I loved my children's big reactions as much as the beauty that was restored here. They are their mother's children in some regards--because it made them so happy to see order restored in my tomato closet/mud room/stockpile storage closet. I am super pumped to be able to use those hanging files again for their important papers--and to see this closet restored to it's former walk-in glory.

Now that we've settled that, we can move on to my organization heaven that I call my coupon binder. Voile!

I used to have a little accordian file, and was quite happy with that system--until I watched Extreme Couponing. While I have no intention of replicating their full-time job of coupon clipping or dumpster diving for coupons--I decided I'd try this coupon binder idea. And, oh my gravy--I LOVE it! I have actually reduced my time and ease whilst grocery shopping with this binder, paired perfectly with this:

This is a screen shot from the Grocery IQ app. (BTW--my 12-year-old son had to show me how to take a screen shot!) Awesomeness. It's a free iPhone app, and I set up my grocery store by aisle. SO, when I put my list in my phone, I can put the items onto the proper aisle. No paper to fumble with! Which originally terrified me--I am a paper girl. But, alas, I am an older dog learning new tricks. Because the Grocery IQ list allows me to shop down my list in order of the store, and happily tap on the item to remove from the list when I place it in my cart. Sorta like an electronic highlighter to mark off your task list.

And, check this out:

Yes, friends--my coupon binder has tabs...and you guessed it. The taps are arranged in the order of the aisles. See how that OCD benefits me? So, my list matches the order of my binder! That is how I roll, and I am loving how easy my coupons are to see.

See? I used plastic sleeves for 4"x 6" pictures, which I find to be a really useful size for coupons. Each little sleeve--of course--holds like items, such as toothpastes, shampoos, baking mixes, etc.

Just to expound a bit further, here is how I work my grocery shopping system. I check the Grocery Game website and print my weekly list of bargains to snag. Then, I go through my pantry, fridge and freezer and add items that I need to restock into my grocery app. I then type in the Grocery Game items to that list, and pull the coupons I KNOW I will need. Those go on a big paper clip inside my binder with my Grocery Game list and the store sales ad--just in case I have a question.

The beauty of this binder is that it gives me a shelf in the front of my cart for my iPhone and all coupons are SO easy to access should I come across a sales item or need another coupon while shopping.

INTENTIONAL challenge: I triple dog dare you to find a couponing system that works for you! You may not be a binder person, which I find hard to fathom about anyone since moving to this system myself. But, you know--to each to his own. You can do it my way or the wrong way. Even if you are short on time, you can shop the sales for your store, and even use a coupon here and there. And, just in case you were wondering (which I doubt you were)...I have indeed recently expanded my binder empire. This coupon binder for grocery shopping has been such a great thing that I recently moved all my eating out coupons into a similar binder. [insert very wide smile here]. Go and shop in binder love!

Importance of Purging

8:20 AMHeather

I know many of us feel there is a black hole in our houses that suck up an assortment of socks and other missing items. In a history making discovery, I believe I have found the black hole of my household.

Indeed, that, my friends, is a black mark on my usually great record of organization. In my defense, let me remind you that I spent 5 months of this year with a neck that didn't function AND I had my three little angels home all summer. Thus, you see, the current state of affairs in our tomato closet. Oh--and no, this isn't where we keep tomatoes. Confusing, I know. But, when we moved in 3 years ago, our preschool daughter thought it important to note that when we have a tomato warning, we must all get into this closet under the stairs. And, yes, she has long ago corrected herself to call them tornados--but it's so cute the family can't let go of the old Caris-ism.

My mission today? Besides lunch with a friend since high school--is to do something about this catastrophe. Every time I open the door to this closet, I make some statement about the pit of despair that this space has become. It makes me nuts to see this chaos, causing great distress in my mind.

And true confessions time--I feel that all too often, my heart and mind look a lot like this. Chaotic, messy and cluttered. I hang on to old wounds, bad memories, fears, anxieties, statements I perceive as critical, lies and deceit about my self-worth. I let them crowd out the freedom and space that comes from the TRUTH of who I am in Christ. This clutter allows little room for such truths to take root. Just as this closet causes me distress to just look at it--my cluttered heart and mind cause distress. I walk through each day, dragging the load of this chaos. Life more abundant in Christ? There's no room for such things.

INTENTIONAL challenge: Enough is enough. Just as I have declared that TODAY is the THE day to purge, sort and dispose of unnecessary clutter in this tomato closet--today is the day to deal with my mental and heart clutter. Today is the day to hand over my burdens to God's huge hands and leave them there. Today is the day to release my anxieties, wounds and baggage to Him, wrestling that through one item at a time. Today is the day to say, "Lord, take this specific hurt, take this specific worry, take this specific lie--and replace it with your truth." Today is the day to deal with my true clutter:

²⁸ “Come to me, all you who are

weary and burdened,

and I will give you rest.

²⁹ Take my yoke upon you and

learn from me, for I am gentle

and humble in heart,

and you will find rest for your souls.

³⁰ For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.”

Matthew 11:28-30

Abba, help me recognize each bit of my burden and release it to you--help me to hand it over completely, and purge it from me. Show up BIG here, Lord, and give me your rest.