The Plus is the Problem

9:56 AMHeather

On the first night of this Lies Women Believe study I noted on Facebook that I thought it would be a brutally awesome Bible study.  Truer words were never spoken.  Brutal.  Yet in an awesome way.  This last week we've been focusing on the lies we tend to believe about God.  Lots of zingers for me there--hitting me square between the eyes.  

One of which is the fact that the plus is a problem in my life.  You see, I tend to struggle with the idea that God is enough.  I tend to fall into that category of "God plus [fill in the blank]" is enough.  Here is what this looks like for me.  Right now, I have a decision to make.  And, yes, I have prayed about it.  I've asked the Lord to show me the best path to take.  Yet, I still have this craving to take a poll of all my friends, my husband, and others to see what they think.  I'm looking for that answer, and rather than pour myself in prayer, I want the opinion and advice of those around me.  

Or, I tend to struggle with anxiety.  It's an old stronghold for me, one that continually haunts me to varying degrees.  While I KNOW that God is my provider, I tend to feel angst about our continual pursuit to build a good savings account.  In other words, this shows up that God plus an adequate savings account is my security.

How about this lovely one?  The God of the entire Universe--the Creator of all that is--loves me to death.  Literally--the death of his one and only Son.  You'd think basking in all that love would make me feel--well, LOVED--and secure and joyful.  But, yet, I have this tendency to feel that God's love plus the approval of others equals my ability to feel loved.  UGH.

I am seeing these things clearly--recognizing once again these strongholds to battle, these deceits to weed out, these things that need to changing.  And, I feel more angst about how to go about this.  It feels like the same old struggle.  I have the head knowledge--I can quote some Scripture.  But, the heart is another matter.

INTENTIONAL challenge:  So, bloggy friends, all I can say is that I am asking God to show up.  I am asking Him to just take these things--these "pluses" and clear them out.  I am asking Him to give me EYES to see how very "ENOUGH" He is.  I am throwing my hands up, acknowledging my "pluses" and pleading with him each time I struggle or think about it to just remove them and erase them completely.  I am asking Him to write all over my heart and head that He is enough--enough said.

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