I took time to read through it all. All of it. The entire Facebook page, journaling the battle against childhood cancer. This precious girl who I do not know. The same age as my own baby girl. Fighting like a champion. Fighting for her life. 

Her aunt is a friend of mine. I read through every post chronicling her struggle. And it's stuck with me. I find myself thinking about their family. The mother, a lady maybe much like me. Who had a normal life one day. And with one blood test, everything changed. With one lab result, all that the family had known as normal was thrown out the window. And every little thing that had felt like a big deal suddenly wasn't--or at least that's how I imagine it.

Because in a flash, perspective came slamming down on them. As their reality became what must feel like a nightmare. A prison of pain and suffering and the unknown. 

My mind has dwelt on this family. And then in turn, to others. It's turned my thoughts to the friend who is much like that little girl's brother. Because her own sister is in a similar fight, and like the brother, this friend of mine will be donating her blood marrow. Praying that it brings the cure.

So many of you are places of hardship that feel unfair. Unending. Depleting. Day after day after day. The same old story.

It feels trite to write this blog post. To even attempt to assuage the suffering with my inadequate musings. So please forgive me if it feels that way to you, too. Please know that my deepest desire is to somehow communicate a hope through the truth of God's word.

And so, I write. Because it's what I feel led to do. And I pray that God infuses these words to impact your soul. 

Because the story of Easter holds a truth...a gem...a treasure that changes everything.

And no matter how many times I read the story, I continually mine new nuggets of gold every time. Something I never noticed before. Something that hits me over the head.

Something like this:

Then the high priest stood up before them and asked Jesus, "Are you going to answer? What is this testimony that these men are bringing against you?" But Jesus remained silent and gave no answer. Again, the high priest asked him, "Are you the Christ, the Son of the Blessed One?" "I am," said Jesus, "And you will see the Son of Man sitting on the right hand of the Mighty One and coming on the clouds in heaven."
Mark 14:60-62 

There it is. That two letter phrase. With a power that changes everything. Like the breaking of sunrise after the darkest night. Bringing a hope that might sustain anyone suffering, anyone wondering, anyone questioning if things will ever change. Anyone desperately pleading for a way out of the troubles they face.

Two little words.

I am.

I saw it as if highlighted in a different color in my Bible. I Am. It jumped out at me and stirred my curiosity.

Could it be?

Might it be?

So I did some research. I went to one of my favorite websites and input that little phrase. Searching to see if I was right.

Listen, I'm not a Bible scholar. I have no degree in divinity or theology and I've been known to be wrong a time or two or twenty. So, I may not be 100% accurate on this one, but from what I was able to find, my suspicions were confirmed.

I am.

First seen in Scripture, in that exact little phrasing... in Exodus 3:14.

God said to Moses, I AM who I AM. This is what you say to the Israelites: I AM has sent me to you."

I've long heard the term the "scarlet thread of Scripture"--how from beginning to end, it tells the same story, the same theme. Of Jesus paying the debt we could never pay.

But I had never seen this particular facet of it. This thing that I pray sparks hope in every hurting soul.

God declared his identity to Moses...I AM. God uttered those words to clearly state that he was the I AM who would deliver his people from hundreds of years of captivity. I AM was going to break their chains, change their destiny, and bring freedom. I AM would be their deliverer. From the fate and circumstances that plagued them, burdened them, impacted them--for generations.

I AM was their deliverer. He was the one. I AM that I AM. 

The one who rescues and frees and steps into our messes and our sorrows to offer a way out. Like the brave firemen who went up into the burning buildings on 9/11 to bring rescue from the inferno.

That's who God declares he is.

I AM. 

The way out. The One we cry out to when we are desperate.

And here, in Mark 14, we see this idea of I AM, in full circle. 

Jesus. The fulfillment of every foreshadowing, every prophecy that the entirety of the Old Testament might provide.

Jesus says, "I AM."  I AM the one who will free you. I AM the one who will deliver you. Just as God delivered the Israelites from captivity and brought them out from bondage, Jesus will do so with great finality.

Ultimately.

He will finish the job. He finishes his bold statement to the high priests with the rest of the story. The way that it will all go. The never ending happy ending.

Because he will sit at the right hand of God on the throne. Meaning his work is complete. I AM will then sit. And not only that, but he will come on the clouds. In one little response, Jesus ties it all up for these unhearing accusers.

He says, I AM. The deliverer. The one who will finish the job with ultimate deliverance. And the one who will come on the clouds to reign forever in a new heaven and a new earth.

No matter where you are today...no matter what circumstances are overwhelming you today, let me remind you who our God is.

He is I AM that I AM. He is all that you need. Present tense. From the very beginning, his identity and role in our lives is Deliverer. The exit. The way out, in every moment. The one we can cry out to from our deepest angst. The one who says, I hear you. And I've got you. And I am your deliverer.

And not only that. 

His Son, Jesus, is the I AM. The one who paid the price. The one who finished and completed the job. The one who could say, "It is finished!" Because he is our Deliverer. 

He is the one who brought victory over every sin and thus freedom for all mankind. He is the one who conquered even death. He is the reason behind the verse that asks even death...even the ultimate fate...this taunting question.

Oh death...WHERE is your sting?  1 Corinthians 15:55

Indeed. Even death. Even the loss of physical life has lost its sting because of the I AM who answered those high priests and with two little words completed the sentence.

God said, I AM. I will deliver my people.

Jesus said, I AM. I will deliver ALL people.

God said, I AM. I will bring them out of Egyptian captivity.

Jesus said, I AM. I will bring every man and woman and child out of the captivity of sin and a hopeless eternity.

God said, I AM. I will take away the chains and the sting of slavery.

Jesus said, I AM. I will take away ALL chains and the sting of death.

I AM.

Two words that make all the difference. Two words that glow like a neon exit sign above the door within any prison, any circumstance, any struggle.

He will deliver us. In his way. In his time. According to his purpose and the glory of God the Father. 

So wherever we are. No matter our struggle, we can cry out loudly to the I AM. We can remember the heartbeat of the God Almighty since the beginning of time. To be our Deliverer. If you need a way out...if you are desperately asking yourself--"there's gotta be a way out,"....then remember this.

We have a heavenly Father who is our deliverer. He sent his Son to finish the job. With the slam of finality. We are freed. From any hold the troubles of this earth might have over us. 

And it makes me think of a lyric of a David Crowder song.

Earth has no sorrow that heaven can't heal.

May we all find comfort there. In that truth.

That the I AM will deliver us. And victory shall reign, forever and ever and ever.