Frugal Friday--Financial Fitness Begins with a Budget

In my quest to purge my home these last few weeks, I have found some interesting items.   Broken things that I intended to fix.  Baby items I was keeping for when babies come to visit (yes, I've embraced the idea of borrowing said items when needed).  Every letter of commendation my Poppy received from his consulting business.  Lots of junk.  But, also a few treasures--and some really random things.  Like the receipt for Dave Ramsey's Total Money Make-Over Live Event--that we attended in February 2006.  I decided to keep that, and here's why.

That marked the beginning of our journey toward becoming debt-free and more financially fit.  It's been a journey for sure--not just financially, but for our marriage and in our walks with the Lord.  Chris and I have walked together and worked together to become more obedient Biblically and wise about our money, and to trust the Lord to provide for us and help us.  

We are currently at a point of needing to tweak things a bit again and pull in the reigns.  There are some needs and wants coming in the next few months that require us to rearrange our budget so that we can cut some line items in order to create some savings for the upcoming needs.  

Which brings me back to the starting point of financial fitness--that dirty little word--something known as a budget.  Right now, I have several friends in the same boat.  Actually, I think probably everyone I know is in the same boat.  Don't we all need to make some changes in order to put ourselves in a better position financially?

So if aren't really sure where to start, but you know you need to do something to change your finances, let me give you some basic starting points today.  First, I present to you Dave Ramsey's recommended budget.  Take a gander.

Charity 10-15%

Savings 5-10%

Housing 25-35% (including insurance, repairs, taxes, etc)

Utilities 5-10%

Food  5-15% (all food!  Even eating out)

Transportation 10-15%

Clothing 2-7%

Medical 5-10%

Personal 5-10%

Recreation 5-10%

Debt 5-10%

So, here's what you do with this.  Take your net pay (take home pay) every month, and multiply that number by the recommended percentage in order to determine the amount you SHOULD be spending on these categories every month.  Because Dave's percentages vary per category--obviously, make sure you are totaling only 100%.  

As you do your math, you will see areas where you need to cut to make allowances.  For instance, if your mortgage, car payments, or debts go beyond the recommended percentage--you will have to cut other categories to compensate.  If you have an irregular cash flow rather than a set fixed income, check out Dave Ramsey's website for some tips on this situation of irregular income.

Now, determine together that you will live within these perimeters.  It won't be easy--but being debt free and more financially fit is oh-so-worth the efforts--which is what I tell myself all the time.  Who wants to keep up with the Joneses--who as Dave Ramsey says--are knee deep in debt?!

And if you want to REALLY attack your financial problems?  Look at these categories and determine which ones should be paid with cash.  Obviously, you pay things like mortgages and utilities from your checking account--and we pay our tithe from our checking, too.  We have also determined to pay for gas with our debit card because I am not running in to pay cash every time I fill up.  So, we allow for that set amount to stay in our checking account each pay check.  

Then, here's what happens. When pay day comes every other week, I go to online bill pay from our checking (where Chris' paycheck is direct deposited) and I pay tithe first.  Why?  I want to live within Biblical standards financially, so I pay our tithe FIRST every pay day. Then I pay all our bills and our mortgage is automatically deducted.  Next, I go to the bank and get the cash amount I need to cover all cash categories--food, clothes, personal, recreation, etc.  I slip the proper amount in a coupon accordian organizer for each category.  That, my friends, is what we have until the next pay day for each category.  That is how we stay within a budget.

Switching to using cash is not easy.  Trust me--it took us a while to adjust and to get the hang of it.  But, oh the sense of control we have now knowing that we WILL live within perimeters rather than wondering where our money went!   We are much more deliberate about how we spend our money--nothing like handing over the green to make you think twice.  Dave Ramsey says people spend less in their budgets when they pay with cash.  He did a study of this, and if I remember right, he says people will spend about 20-25% less total when they are paying with cash.  Well, I am a nerd when it comes to money--so about 6 months into our cash system, I decided to do my own calculations.  Guess what?!  We were spending 31% less total with cash!  And, honestly, I hardly felt deprived.  Quite the contrary--I felt so empowered that I was in control of my money instead of vice versa.  

INTENTIONAL challenge:  Listen, I know it's overwhelming.  It was for us when we started--and 5 years later, it is still hard.  Financial needs change constantly and we must continually tweak and work at it.  It can be hard to know where to start.  There is a wealth (pun intended) of information out there.  But, I hope that today I gave you some basic tips that you might try.  I hope they feel like practical applications.  I KNOW they will make a big difference if you'll give them a try.   So, do your math, set your budget, give it a try and tweak as needed--and I dare you to just TRY using cash.   I'll be the first one to cheer you on in the check-out line--even if you take a little longer to pay with your cash.  Cold hard cash, spent on set amounts in each category--financial fitness straight ahead!

Carpe Diem or Coram Deo?

I am going to completely date myself and talk about that classic movie Dead Poets Society.  What a great flick!  That came out while I was in college, and I have great memories from a college church retreat based on that movie.  We'd watch part of the movie, then divide into our small groups to tie in Biblical principles.  Yes, I have long thought that CARPE DIEM!  is a great battle cry in this life.  Surely, we should seize the day and make the most of every opportunity.  

But, while reading my Lies Women Believe chapter yesterday, I saw a new and bigger challenge.  Personally, I felt convicted that it trumps even carpe diem.  I need to be about coram deo.  Now, unless you are my brilliant friend, Amy Brooks--or one of her Latin students--you may be as clueless as I was.  But, Coram Deo means "before the face of God."  Here's some further insight from Nancy Leigh DeMoss:  

Coram Deo

Living all of life

in the presence of God

under the authority of God

and to the glory of God

Here's the thing.  We live in an "all about me" world--even within the church walls.  Even the well intentioned carpe diem mentality can get us into trouble when we are seizing our day for ourselves.  Oh, we can dress it up in a pretty Biblical bow and think about seizing the day that God has given us--and honestly, that in and of itself is not necessarily wrong.  But, oh the world of difference it would make in my day if my absolute focus and goal were to be before the face of God--to be intent on living FOR Christ, to be determined to approach everything I do and say to be about bringing Him glory--making Him known.

Do you see the BIG difference that this slight tweaking makes?  If we are ever more passionate about His fame, His pleasure, His glory, instead of our own desires, then what might your life look like?  I think your life looks something like Jim Elliott--giving it all, counting no costs, for the glory of God.  I think your life looks something like Rachel Scott or Cassie Bernall at Columbine--living for Christ no matter what.  How about that Iranian pastor whose face I keep seeing on Facebook?  Unyielding in his stance for Christ, even with the threat of death.  Or, in my own life--it looks like my Dad.  Told his cancer could not be removed and death was imminent, he quoted Philippians 1:21, "For to me to live is Christ, and to die is gain."  My dad truly had lived that out in his life, and did until his dying breath.  


Coram deo doesn't just say carpe diem.  But, it says seize the day--not for my own good or agenda--but for GOD'S alone.  It makes that remarkable statement that Paul wrote in Philippians 3:8:

More than that, I count all things to be loss in view of the surpassing value of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord, 

for whom I have suffered the loss of all things, and count them but rubbish so that I may gain Christ.

(New American Standard version) 

INTENTIONAL challenge: Rubbish.  Everything rubbish compared to gaining Christ.  Wow.  THAT is heart of coram deo.  To be that singularly focused.  To see each moment through the view of eternal value, shaking off the temporal.  And even more--to be able to shake off myself and cling wholeheartedly to Him instead.  Lord, please help me to have your eyes on this.  Help me to be ever more about making you known through every day--to take up my cross, my agenda, and lay it down, seeing it as worthless in light of gaining YOU.  Help me to not just carpe diem--help me to coram deo!

Under the Circumstances

If you see me using crutches to get around, just know that it's because my toes have been severely damaged from being stepped on through the Bible study Lies Women Believe.    And, if you ask me how I am BEFORE I did this study, I might be inclined to say, "Oh, pretty good--under the circumstances."  Don't we often hear of people enduring great trials and we shake our heads sympathetically to say something about how they are doing the best that can be expected--under the circumstances.  

Um, yeah, so I am super duper convicted by the following quote from Nancy Leigh DeMoss.

"We have been deceived into believing we would be happier if we had a different set of circumstances.  The Truth is,

if we are not content within our present circumstances,

we are not likely to be happy in any other set of 

circumstances...The Truth is, our circumstances do not

make us what we are.  They merely reveal what we are."

Can I hear a resounding OUCH from the audience?  Oh. My. Gravy.  Not easy to hear that are deceived when we attribute our problems to our circumstances.  That mentality makes us fall back into the victim mentality.  It tells us that we are not responsible for our behavior--it's just merely that our circumstances are so difficult.  But, oh the brutal Truth from above--that our circumstances do not make us what we are--they merely reveal what we already are.  

Stinks to have to put on my big girl pants and own up to my faults.  Own up to the fact that my irritability toward my kids is not because my lack of sleep but because I am impatient.  Ouch that my feelings of stress and anxiety are not because I am under the gun but because I have a trust issue with the Lord.  Don't even mention how my discontent is not because of some unattained goal or something out of reach but because I have an ungrateful heart.

INTENTIONAL challenge:  George Washington's wife, Martha got it.  Just listen to her wisdom in a letter she wrote to her friend, Mercy Warren:

"I am still determined to be cheerful and happy in whatever situation I may be; for I have also learned from experience that the greater part of our happiness or misery depends on our dispositions and not on our circumstances.  We carry the seeds of the one or the other about with us in our minds, wherever we go."

Nancy Leigh DeMoss went there, bloggy friends.  She pointed out a major flaw in most of us.  She revealed a deceit that many of us--self included--use as a crutch to excuse our poor behavior.  The Truth is that I see this deceit glaring in my own life.  And, at this point, I think my most honest response is that I can admit my desire to want to root this out of my mind and heart.  I want to want to.  I want to want to grab hold and do the hard work of weeding out this lie and changing my mentality.  I can't really begin to imagine how my day to day would differ would I to be rid of this deceit.  I see that Truth--and I am praying for the guts to let the Truth set me free.  Even if it's from my own lame excuses.

Clarifying Confusion on Confession

Lest any of you doubt, why yes, I was a preacher's kid.  As today's blog post title attests, I can do alliteration with the best of them--because it's in my blood.  

On the topic of this blog post, I have to say that I feel I have spent much of my adult life unraveling confusion and misunderstandings about faith from my childhood.  I grew up in a strong Christian home--it's not that anyone misled me.  It's more that I took the information and training given to me and saw them through my own immature perspective.  Kinda like I was confused by osmosis because maybe some things weren't clearly explained.  I don't think I knew enough to ask questions or have an open dialog on these matters.  But as my faith became my own in my college years, I realized for the first time that some cloudy things were just that--cloudy and perhaps not on track exactly with Scripture.  Can anyone relate here?

One of these things was the idea of confession.  It's honestly just been in the last few years that I'm beginning to understand the difference between when we confess our sins while asking Jesus to be our Lord to begin our walk with him and when we are called to daily confess our sins.  

Here's the verse that I remember being taught about confessing our sins to accept Him as Lord and be saved:

If you declare [confess] with your mouth, “Jesus is Lord,” 

and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, 

you will be saved.

Romans 10:9 

Okay.  Got it.  But if we do that...then what does it mean to confess our sins continually?  Does that mean salvation comes and goes--you have to continually confess in order to earn salvation?  That became a clear question as I matured.    What does it really mean to follow 1 John 1:9?

 If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins andpurify us from all unrighteousness. 

I can remember being taught that this particular verse talked about the ongoing act of confession.  Yi yi yi.  Really confused.  Maybe it's just me...but as I continue my journey with the Lord, I realize just how much I have to yet to learn--or relearn.  SO much to unravel, so many light bulb moments are needed.

If any of this makes sense--if ANY of you have wrestled with this--or your children are, then I have some insight to share.  Recently, I heard a really great word picture to help me clarify the confusion on confession.

When we reach a point of confessing Him as our Savior--as we tell our kids--telling Jesus we want Him to be the boss of our lives forever and confessing that we are a sinner, that is the confession or declaration of salvation, as noted in Romans 10:9.   

As we journey with Christ, our relationship will hopefully deepen and become more intimate with Him.  And by way of tending to that relationship and growth, we are to agree with God when we sin.  In the original language, the word used for ongoing confession of sin conveyed this concept of agreeing with God.  This is the ongoing confession of sin--it's the daily, regular acknowledgment of where we've veered off course and displeased Him.  Of course, He knows those things and has already forgiven them.  We don't have to earn our salvation by continually confessing.  We are just agreeing with Him--growing with Him to say, "hey, it was wrong when I did that.  I agree with you.  I want to do differently."  Much as we would do with our spouse or kids or friends--to keep obstacles out of the way of our intimacy and fellowship.  And, ongoing confession paves the way to avoid grieving or quenching the Holy Spirit in us.  Want to be filled with the Spirit?  Want to live a Spirit filled and directed life?  Then you gotta clear out those sin habits that grieve and quench the Spirit from doing His job.  And, as hard as it is for my perfectionistic personality to accept--this practice of confession will be never ending this side of heaven.  This is not a task to clear off the list.  Rather, it's a regular item to tend to, day after day.  That's life on earth--wrestling with our sin nature, striving to be more like Him. 

INTENTIONAL challenge:  This epiphany came to mind again during my great purging project.  As I was carting out bag after bag of clutter, I thought of how motivated I am to purge as I go in order to avoid this accumulation of junk.  I remembered the rule I heard about when you bring one thing into the house, you take one thing out of the house.  I contemplated how I could make purging a more regular practice.  And, then the A-HA that this is exactly what I must do in my prayer life.  I must continually, regularly take out the trash--acknowledge and agree with Him about the sin and my fleshly tendencies, lest it accumulate to the point that it is a barrier between Him and me--lest it quench or grieve the Spirit.  Oh, He's already forgiven me.  Those sins are taken care of.  And, it's not that He doesn't know.  No, it's for MY own good that I continually purge these things, being ever more mindful of the sin habits that need to be addressed.  Lord, as I walk with you--give me eyes to see where I sin.  Help me see what I do or say or think that quenches or grieves the Spirit.  Give me your perspective to hate these habits and give me your strength to turn from them!  May I purge as I go.

God's Call to Be Hoarders

A couple of you may have notice how sporadic my blog posts have been the last two weeks.  At least in my own grandiose thinking, I'd like to pretend this was noted by someone?  If not, humor me.  Well, bloggy friends.  Here's the deal.  I've been really busy doing this.

And, this. 

Oh, for the love of my new color coded hangers for each child's closet! 

And, how about some rubbermaids?  Some still need a touch from my beloved label maker.  That's my medicine and toiletry stockpile closet.

And, the joys of a purged craft room closet.

Yep, just in case my tendency toward being a tad bit OCD was in question...I present to you exhibit A, B, C, D, and E.  Some of you have teased me in real life (outside the internet) about how you can't believe I'd even have a need for purging.  But, of course!  I like to keep my house tidy--but in times of a busy schedule or messed up neck--all things get shoved into the closets and garage.  And one of my darling MIL's flew in to help me with this huge purging project that was my house AND garage.  (just to clarify--I have one husband--not two--and two amazing sets of in-laws).


Proof of my need to purge?  Check out the evidence on it's way out from the scene of the crime.

Yi yi yi.  That's just ONE van load of donations on it's way to GRACE in Grapevine.  I thought I got a picture of the pile for the 1800GOTJUNK people--but I can't find it for you at this moment.  Yes, folks, hoarders isn't just a disgusting TV show.  


As I was writing out my children's nightly Scripture cards for their pillows, I found this verse in Proverbs.  And, oh how it affirmed my tendency to hoard a little bit. Or, shall I say--how it redirected my tendency to hoard a little bit.

Wise men store up knowledge.

Proverbs 10:14

Friends--don't you see?  God calls us to be hoarders!  Not of junk--but hoarders of His wisdom.  We are to store it up.  Fill up the closets, cabinets and garages of our hearts and minds with KNOWLEDGE.  And not just any knowledge.  I could google a thousand brainiac children right now and see kids who can recite all states and capitols from their cribs.  That's man's knowledge.  No, we are to hoard God's knowledge.  

Just how do we do that?  We should be in His word--and get His word in us.  We should be praying and seeking and praising and thanking Him.  We should be running with the wise and let them rub off on us.  We should be the WISE that others want to run with.  

INTENTIONAL challenge:  It has been amazingly cathartic to purge and simplify around my house.  It has also been alarming to realize the excess JUNK that we tend to live with.  I looked at that pile of stuff to be carted off and realized how rich I was--that my throw-away pile was more than many people in the world will ever own.  When it comes to our possessions--may we learn to be content with less.  But, when it comes to our knowledge of God and our wisdom, may we never be content with anything less than a hoarder mentality!

Frugal Friday--Rubber Mat Wall Hanging

Who can relate to this problem?  You have a huge blank wall--maybe above a couch.  And you don't happen to have a huge budget to fill that huge spot.  Yep, that was me.  So, I turned to my favorite habit.  Craft lifting.

I completed this project a couple of years ago, and can't remember the original blog I got it from.  So, my apologies to that creative genius.  Allow me to share the love with you today, bloggy friends.

That, my friends, cost me a grand total of $35.  Not only was it inexpensive, but it was oh-so-easy-peasy-lemon-squeezy. 

Supplies?  4 pieces of wood 12" x 36"
                 rubber door mat
                 wood stain
                 spray paint
                 4 picture hangers

So, here's what I did.  I took a little trip to Lowes, and bought one of those rubber door mats that look like wrought iron.  

Then, I had the handy lumber guy cut me 4 pieces of really inexpensive plywood--each measuring 12" x 36".  Learn from me--I bought cheap wood because I wasn't sure how this would turn out.  If I had it to do over, I'd buy nicer and thicker wood.

Once I got home, I grabbed some leftover wood stain I happened to find in the garage.  In fact, it was left from the old homeowners.  I'm not picky!  Worked just fine to stain the wood.  You could also paint the wood if you'd rather.

After the wood dried, I put two pieces of wood smashed up together.  Then, throw the rubber mat on top of the wood, lining it up just right.  Simply spray paint and your rubber mat will act as a stencil on the wood!  Again, I just used spray paint I found in the garage.  Any old color combination will do.

Repeat this step on the last two pieces of wood, and allow all the wood to dry.  Nail the picture hangers on the back of each wood piece, and fill up that naked wall! 

Voile!  Big impact, little budget and effort.  Oh--and if you want to borrow my rubber mat, I'm happy to lend it out.  That'll save you even more money.   Happy crafting!

Christians Don't Hate Enough

As I tackled the Lies Women Believe chapter about sin, I came to a realization of what is wrong with myself AND the church at large today.  The truth is that Christians don't hate enough.  

Allow me to clarify that statement, lest you think I am some hate monger akin to a certain church who spreads their message of hate, soiling the name of Christ.  You see, the problem is that Christians don't hate our own personal sin enough.  

Oh, we hate sin alright.  We spew our hatred of other people's sin, or perceived sin, all over the place.  We are so quick to look down upon others and cast a critical eye on all that they do wrong.  I love how Casting Crowns sheds light on this epidemic in their song Stained Glass Masquerade.  We seem to want to sit in our holy huddle, excluding anyone that might not look or act like we think they should.  And, this, in and of itself is sin.  A grievous sin at that--because we turn people off from Christ.  

I recently read a very interesting blog post about how a group of believers attended a gay rights parade with signs saying they were sorry.  Their hope was to express love--the genuine authentic love of Christ.  To right their own personal wrongs in making anyone feel less than the love that Christ would offer were he walking the earth today.   It was intriguing to me to say the least.  Because I think Christ would want us to throw the church doors--and more importantly--our own heart doors--wide open, expressing His love, to everyone.  Christ modeled this all throughout Scripture in his ministry.  He hung with the sinners.  He steered clear of the judgmental ways of the Pharisees and Saducees.  He proved His love on the cross.  His love for all.  And we cheapen that love when we don't do the same. 

I believe that in my own life and the church at large, much would change were we to truly hate our own sin enough.  Were we to turn that critical magnifying glass on the log in our own eye, what would change?  If we were so disgusted by our own sin that we surrendered ourselves completely to being refined and changed by the Holy Spirit--then what?!  I tell you what.  I think revival. In fact, God promises just that.  Take a look.

If my people, who are called by my name, will humble themselves and pray and seek my face and turn from their wicked ways, then I will hear from heaven, and I will forgive their sin and will heal their land.

2 Chronicles 7:14

How appealing do you think we make God's grace appear when we don't even extend it ourselves?   How different does a walk with God look from the world when we don't hate our sin enough to continually seek to root it out?   What makes our lives in Christ abundant?  Is it our abundance of hating other sins--or ignoring our own?  I realize I have got to hate my sin more--so much so that I am determined to be freed from its clutches to walk an ever more God honoring life, day by day.

INTENTIONAL challenge:    What do you think?  Do you hate your sin enough to ever strife to be rid of it?  Or do you have some codependent relationship with it--keeping it around like a baby pet python that will eventually grow so big it will strangle you?  Oh, Lord--help me to HATE and despise my sin and turn it to you to rid me from it, changing me day by day, baby step by baby step--to glorify you more.  Help me to be a living example of your love!  Let those around me see a difference in me--a Spirit filled life--instead of living in my fleshly nature!

Acting like an Orphan

Yesterday morning as I sat in worship, I had a profound moment.  Oh, the worship was amazing, and YES, I felt that I met God there.  But, the impact came when I glanced in front of me and saw the youth worshipping.  One of the college girls was standing there, singing her heart out, hands raised in praise, and I was overwhelmed.

You see, I have known this amazing young lady since she first came to join her family through adoption at age two.  She was this chubby faced DARLING toddler, and her family was the first to go through the Russian program at The Gladney Center where I worked.  Because I worked in domestic adoption, I only knew her family through our monthly orientations for potential adoptive parents.  This little girl and her family would come in and share their story.  I was moved by their story, these four little children--two biological, two adopted.  The little girls wore matching bows and wide smiles.  The boys were quiet and well behaved, and the parents were repeatedly asked to share in their eloquent way the hope of adoption.

Years later, we would come to join the church where this family worships, and I now count them among our closest friends.  The kind of friends you can call in the middle of the night--which, as a matter of fact, we have.  And, I have come to know the heart of this young lady--passionate for serving the Lord, eager to work with and for orphans.  She is simply incredible.

And, yesterday, as I glanced at her, I was overcome with the thought of where her life would be if she had not been adopted.  The truth is that she may not even be alive.  If not adopted, orphans are generally emancipated and left to care for themselves while in their late teens.  Life on the streets is hard--so hard that the life expectancy is short and prospects are grim.  By the grace of God, her adoption first into her forever family--and then into an eternal family--have dramatically changed her future.

Her dad happened to be leading our lesson last night during Life Group.  The lesson  was about passive righteousness--which was a new term to me, coined by Martin Luther.  The lesson wrapped up with a self-inventory about whether we live as orphans or as children and heirs of our Loving Father.  And like a ton of bricks, I realized something.  I HAVE been adopted--given a bright future and a hope.  I have been made a child of the King.  Like this amazing girl--my path has been altered completely.  

So, why do I continue to live like an orphan?  Why do I go through each day, all Eeyore with the slightest hard circumstance instead of the HOPE I have in my Jesus who made me more than a conqueror because He loved me to death?  Why do I struggle to feel loved and accepted--as though I am a street child--when a place will be set for me at the banquet table of my Groom?   Why can't I throw my arms up in praise and with full abandon embrace the life I've been given--like our dear friend?

INTENTIONAL challenge:  Where do you see yourself in this scenario?  Do you embrace your adoption and shake off the doom and gloom that could have been yours--had it not been for Christ?  Or do you get bogged down like me--living like an orphan, feeling rejected, anxious about circumstances, beaten down by life, trying to fix things on your own?  Oh--that we would throw off our rags, abandon our street life, embrace our identity as children and heirs, and throw our arms up in praise, singing with full abandon to our Heavenly Father who made us His own!