The Prude vs. The Porn

12:37 PMHeather

If you think this is going to be one of those ranting blog posts decrying the ills of society, you are right.  Because I've had enough.  And, since I have this public forum, I felt it was a good time to share my opinion.

Monday afternoon, I took my children and a-child-on-loan to get ice cream in the mall food court.  There it was...a huge window display directly across from the ice cream kiosk, and within yards of the children's merry-go-round.  It was a picture of a scantily clad young lady serving as an advertisement for a lingerie store.  Okay, okay.  Sure it's a lingerie store.  But, my goodness--you were face to face with this picture that I felt bordered on soft porn.  You may see me as a prude for feeling offended.  Then, I guess I really can't explain what it's like to have to warn my boys and their friend to look away.  Because men are wired visually, and these young men entering their adolescent years will undoubtedly be faced with many such images.  But, I didn't expect to have to warn them to shield their eyes from THAT in what should be a family friendly food court.  Or how, pray tell, would you advise me to explain to my daughter that a body like that is not realistic and her body image should not be warped.  And, how to convince her that the only way to appear attractive is NOT to show so much skin or be a sex object?

I guess I'm a prude because I hate the fact that within a one mile radius there are 3 restaurants whose branding includes scantily clad waitresses.  Sure, the wings are great.  But, that isn't REALLY what they are selling.  It goes way beyond that.  It's an image that women are only as valuable as their, well, valuable assets.  And, men can be tempted by images that are culturally acceptable--and that can be the beginning of a very slippery slope.  I guess I'm a prude because I think it's RIDICULOUS that a restaurant called Twin Peaks advertises that kids eat free.  Oh, sure--that's a great alternative to Chuck E. Cheese.

I guess I'm a prude that I am alarmed by these blurry lines.  All in good fun.  Innocent.  Attractive.  Harmless.  I guess I'm a prude that I am grieved by the lives that are ruined because a downhill slide began with such "innocent" good fun.  I guess I'm a prude because I've seen what is "acceptable" turn into an addiction that is not yet acceptable to discuss.

I guess I'm a prude because I want better not just for my children--but for others as well.  I want families and marriages and lives to not be BROKEN and ruined and torn apart because of an addiction to pornography.  I don't want men to start down a slippery slope that leads them to do things they never thought they would. And they drown in their shame.  I don't want wives to feel inadequate.  I don't want marriages to lack trust.  I don't want an industry that lies to it's participants about worth, value and priorities in life.  

You know, in the circles of those battling alcohol addiction there's a known fact that those with a predisposition need to tread softly.  They should avoid even one sip once they begin their battle for sobriety.  Because it all starts with one sip.  But, what about all men who are predisposed by their genetic make-up to respond to visual stimulation?   You see, I believe countless acts of violence against women and children began because a man once visited a certain kind of establishment, or harmlessly visited a website.  Not that these behaviors always lead to such an outcome.  But, I bet that 100% of the men who did unspeakable things would pinpoint someplace in time when innocent good fun lured them.

So, call me a prude if you will.  I'm okay with that.  But, please don't mishear me.  I am not railing against anyone who likes to visit certain restaurants or who buy certain magazines.  I am simply trying to be a voice of reason to say that it CAN be more dangerous than it would appear.  I am simply wanting to be a warning label--this stuff can lead you places you never wanted to go.  And, so, I will continue to try to raise my boys to choose BEST--not good.  To learn self-control, to learn "just a glance, don't take a chance."  I am wanting to raise a girl (and boys for that matter) who see beauty as a heart that loves the Lord so fiercely that it overflows into kindness to those around them.  And, I am wanting to be the voice of those I know who are all alone or struggling or missing their family or broken hearted because their addiction overtook them.  And it all began with one glance.

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